|I went to a Inter-Religion Integration Seminar.|
The Bishop came, laid his hands on my hand and said, "By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!"
I smiled and told him I was not paralysed.
The Rabbi came, laid his hands on my hand and said, "By the will of God Almighty, you will walk today!
He was not amused when I told him there was nothing wrong with me.
The Mullah came, took my hands and said, "Insha Allah, you will walk today!"
I politely told him, "There's nothing wrong with me."
The Hindu sadhu came and said, "Son, you will walk on your legs today."
I said, "Babaji - nothing wrong with my legs"
The Buddhist Monk came, held my hands and said, "By the will of The Great Buddha, you will walk today!"
I had to tell him there was nothing wrong with me.
After the Seminar, I stepped outside and found my car had been stolen. I believe in all Religions now...
|Sister Marry was truly a religious woman. Besides for her duties as a nun, she was also very active in various hospitals visiting sick patients and taking care of all their needs.|
So it was no surprise that one day when she ran out of petrol, the only container she could find to put the gas into was a bedpan.
Sister Mary happily walked to the closest petrol station filled up the bedpan and headed back to her car.
Luck would have it that as Sister Mary started tipping the petrol into the fuel tank, the traffic light turned red and she had quite a large audience witnessing the spectacle.
Just when she finished pouring in the last drops a fellow opened up his window and hollered, "I swear! If that car starts I'm becoming a monk!"
|Two church members were going door-to-door through the neighbourhood and finally arrived at Mrs. Smith's house.|
She was not happy to see them. She greeted them with an attitude that made it clear she had no time to waste on them or their message. As she slammed the door in their faces, though, to her surprise, it bounced back open.
She caught it, slammed it again, but the same thing happened!
Convinced the man must be sticking his foot in the doorway, she reared back to slam it hard enough to teach him a lesson, when he cried, "Ma'am, before you do that again, you really should move your cat!"
|A preacher said, "Anyone with 'special needs' who wants to be prayed over, please come forward to the front by the altar."|
With that, Leroy got in line, and when it was his turn, the Preacher asked, "Leroy, what do you want me to pray about for you?"
Leroy replied, "Preacher, I need you to pray for help with my hearing."
The preacher put one finger of one hand in Leroy's ear, placed his other hand on top of Leroy's head, and then prayed and prayed and prayed.
He prayed a "blue streak" for Leroy, and the whole congregation joined in with great enthusiasm.
After a few minutes, the preacher removed his hands, stood back and asked, "Leroy, how is your hearing now?"
Leroy answered, "I don't know. It ain't 'til next week."