• No Sleep !

    Exhausted looking Santa dragged himself in to the Doctor`s office. "Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can`t get a wink of sleep."
    "I have good news for you," the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. "Here are some new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these and your trouble will be over."
    "Great," Santa answered, "I`ll try anything. Let`s give it a shot."
    A few weeks later Santa returned, looking worse than ever. "Doc, your plan is no good. I`m more tired than before!"
    "I don`t understand how that could be", said the doctor, shaking his head. "Those are the strongest pills on the market!"
    "That may be true," answered Santa, "but I`m still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one it`s hard getting him to swallow the pill!!!"
  • Santa`s lucky number

    Santa got up one Saturday morning with the odd feeling that something about this day was to be different. Something unusual was about to happen. He glanced out the window at the thermometer: 33 degrees. He went downstairs - the clock had stopped at 3 o`clock. He picked up the newspaper and read the date: the 3rd of the month.
    Threes - that was it! Santa grabbed the paper and flipped it open to the racing section. Sure enough in the 3rd race, there was a horse named Trio! Santa hurried to the bank, drew out his life savings and bet it all on the horse to win.
    The horse ran third.
  • Pregnancy test !

    Jeeto came running up to Santa jumping for joy.
    Not knowing how to react, Santa started jumping up and down along with her. "Why are we so happy?" Santa asked.
    Jeeto, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"
    "Great" he said, "tell me what you`re so happy about."
    Jeeto stopped breathless from all the jumping up and down. "I`m pregnant!" she gasped.
    Santa was ecstatic as they had been trying for a while. Santa grabbed her, kissed her, and started telling her how wonderful it was, and that he couldn`t be happier.
    Then Jeeto said "Oh, honey there`s more."
    "What do you mean more?", he asked.
    "Well we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!"
    Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, he asked her how she knew.
    "It was easy" she said, "I went to the pharmacy and bought the 2 pack home pregnancy test kit and both tests came out positive!"
  • Money back !

    Santa buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number.
    Santa says, "I want my 10 million."
    The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn`t work that way. We give you a million today and then you`ll get the rest spread out for the next 9 years."
    Santa said, "Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it."
    Again, the man explain that he would only get a million that day and the rest during the next 9 years.
    Santa, furious with the man, screams out, "Look, I want my money! If you`re not going to give me my 10 million right now, then I want my Rs 100 back!"