• Laajawab Santa

    Santa Bhaga-Bhaga Hotel Ke Manager Ke Pass Aya Aur Chillata Hua Bola: Jaldi Chalo, Meri Biwi Khidki Se Kud Kar Jaan Dena Chahti Hai.

    Manager: Toh Tumhe Samjhana Chahiye, Tumhari Biwi Hai... Main Kya Kar Sakta Hun?

    Santa: Oye Kamine, Vo Khidki Khul Nahin Rahi Hai.

    Santa Ne Bus Mein Ek Ladki Ko Chhed Diya.
    Ladki: Tumhare Ghar Mein Maan-Behen Nahi Hai Kya?
    Santa Bholepan Se: Kya Pata Ji, Mein Toh Subah Se Ghar Se Bahar Hoon.

    Santa Apni Job Ke Liye Ek Company Mein Interview Dene Gaya.
    Interviewer Ne Santa Se Puchha: Landline Aur Cellphone Mein Kya Farak Hai?
    Intelligent Answer By Santa: Landline Mein Number Ungliyon Se Dial Karna Padta Hai Aur Cellphone Mein Anguthe Se.

    Ek Baar Santa Ki Biwi Jeeto Ne Bade Pyar Se Santa Ko Bola: Suno ji, Vo Teen Shabd Kaho Na... Jinhe Sunkar Mujhe Dil Se Khushi Mehsoos Hoti Hai.
    Santa: Galti Meri Thi.
  • Purebred Police Dog

    My friend, a recent widower, thought it might be a good idea to get himself a dog for a bit of companionship.

    Checking out the pet ads in the local newspaper he came across one that read: "Purebred Police Dog $25".

    Thinking that sounded like a pretty fair bargain, he called and ordered the dog to be delivered and paid up-front by credit card.

    The very next day a van pulled up and left on his doorstep, in a cardboard kennel, the mangiest looking mongrel he had ever seen.

    In a bit of a rage, he telephoned the man who had placed the ad and shouted over the phone.

    "What the hell do you mean by calling that mangy mutt a Purebred Police Dog?"

    "Hey calm down," the man responded, "Don't be deceived by his looks, mister, that dog's under cover and in the Secret Service."
  • Delivering Bad News

    Tom, Glenn, and Scott were working on a high rise building project. Glenn fell off and was instantly killed.

    As the ambulance took the body away, Scott said, "Someone should go and tell his wife."

    Tom says, "OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it."

    Two hours later, Tom came back carrying a 6-pack. Scott asked, "Where did you get that, Tom?"

    "Glenn's wife gave it to me."

    "That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you the beer?"

    Tom said, "Well not exactly. When she answered the door, I said to her, 'You must be Glenn's widow.' She said, 'No, I'm not a widow.'

    And I said, "Wanna bet me a six-pack?"
  • Announcing Baby Name

    When Donna found out she was pregnant, she told the good news to anyone who would listen. But her 4-year-old son overheard some of his parents' private conversations.

    One day when Donna and her 4-year-old were shopping a woman asked the little boy if he was excited about the new baby.

    "Yes!" the 4-year-old said, "and I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call her Christina, and if it's another boy we're going to call it quits!"