|Just as Santa was about to fall asleep, his wife shook him and said, "I hear someone breaking in."|
At least two nights a week for twenty years Santa had gone through this. He knew that the only way he would get any rest was to go and check it out. So, he went out for a routine check.
When Santa entered the den he was suprised to see a thief. The man held a gun on him and continued to rob the house.
As the theif was about to leave Santa said, "You have to go and meet my wife, Jeeto."
The thief said, "Why would you want me to meet your wife?"
Santa replied, "Well, she's been expecting you from 20 years."
|Santa and Banta were both fanatics about deep sea fishing. Each would come back from fishing trips, and tell the other big lies about the number, and sizes of the fish they caught.|
So Banta comes back from his latest fishing trip, and tells Santa...
"You wouldn't believe, but in Bahamas I caught a 500 pound Herring."
Santa says...." That's nothing, last time I fished in da Bahamas, I pulled up an old lantern from a sunken American ship.... and the candle was still burning !"
They both looked at each other, knowing that the other was lying.
Finally, Santa said to Banta, "Look Banta, if you take 450 pounds from off your herring.... I'll blow out my candle !"
|Ek Baar 4 Yaar Jua Khel Rahe The. Ek Dost Patte Baantne Hi Waala Tha Ki Tabhi Police Aa Gayi...|
Police Inspector: Tum Sab Jua Khel Rahe Ho. Chalo Sab Lock-up Mein.
3 Freinds, Ek Saath: Janaab!!! Hum Kaha Jua Khel Rahe Hai. Hamare Haath Mein Toh Patte Bhi Nahi Hain. Hum Toh Aise Hi Baithe Hain.
Inspector to 4th Guy: Tu Jua Khel Raha Hai, Tere Haath Mein Toh Patte Bhi Hain.
4th Guy: Main Jua Khel Raha Tha? Par Kiske Saath?
|There was an english man, who was singing, "There was a cold day," whilst having a shit in cinema toilets.|
Our Banta walks by and hears him singing, "There was a cold day, There was a cold day," he slam`s the door wide open.
The englishman in a shock says, "What the bloody hell are u doin ?"
Banta replied, "Oh, sorry ! I thought you ar saying, 'Darwaza Khol De' (open the door)."