|Football Rules When We Were Kids !!!|
1. The fat kid was always the goalkeeper.
2. The owner of the ball decides who plays.
3. Penalties awarded only if injured player curses a lot.
4. The match only ends when everyone was tired.
5. No matter how many goals you score, the winner will be determined by the last team to score.
6. No referee and lines men. You could run with the ball even behindt the goal post.
7. If you don't participate in repairing the ball you were given a match ban.
8. If you're picked last, you're a loser.
9. The guy who's never picked to Play was to fetch the ball from the tree or when it got stuck under the car.
10. When the owner of the ball gets annoyed, Game Over.
11. You were allowed to change a goalkeeper in case of a penalty.
12. The most skillful player gets automatic selection.
|Once upon a time there was an archery contest.|
The first archer, wearing a long cape covering his face, lines up in position...
He takes a deep breath and fires an arrow which finds the center of the target.
Then he takes of his cape and screams:
I AM...... ROBIN HOOD!!!
The crowd cheers!
The second archer with a cape lines up in position.
He fires his arrow which hits the center and cuts robin hood's arrow into two!
He takes off his cape and screams:
I AM...... WILLIAM TELL!!!!
The crowd cheers!!
Finally, a third man in cape lines up in position...
He fires his arrow but it goes all wrong!!!
It flies past the crowd and kills the king!!!
Then the man takes off his cape and screams:
I AM...... SORRY!!!
|What if Shikhar Dhawan was to be rated in corporate style after he hit a century against South Africa????|
Dear Shikhar Dhawan,
Firstly, congratulations on team India's 130 run victory against South Africa. That is very much appreciated.
We are pleased to announce that you have been awarded a rating of 'C' (Average Performer) for this match. We realised that your score of 137 was not required when India could win by 130 runs anyway. Only 7 runs from you were needed for the win.
We thank you for your efforts and we wish you all the best for rest of the series. Should you have any questions on the appraisal system, please feel free to contact us during your net practice.
- HR Manager
|Gayle: Sir, I scored 211 Runs in 118 Balls. I made the team win the crucial match. I should get "A" rating.|
Manager: You hit 17 Sixes and 23 Fours. Though, that is good but that is not something new you have done. That is why we hired you. As this is not something new, I will mark it as "Innovation Lacking.'
Gayle: But sir, I played according to the situation. I took 21 singles as well.
Manager: Exactly, your performance is not consistent. You played 15 Dot Balls as well. This means, you failed to optimize the resources.
Manager: Also, I would like to mention that you are not a team player. The whole team scored 112 and you all alone made 211.
Gayle: What ???
Manager: Yes. So, overall, you are getting a "C" rating for the year. Improve Consistency, Innovation, Utilization and Team Work.