• The most understanding people are also the least understood people!
    The most understanding people are also the least understood people!
  • Smart people don't have smart opinions. <br/>
They just really have smart arguments about their opinions!
    Smart people don't have smart opinions.
    They just really have smart arguments about their opinions!
  • Before you see the rainbow, you see the rain. If you want to reach your goals, you have to be able to put up with the pain!
    Before you see the rainbow, you see the rain. If you want to reach your goals, you have to be able to put up with the pain!
  • The perfect life is when you have the second half and you are in love with your work, congratulations, you have it all!<br/>
Happy Monday!
    The perfect life is when you have the second half and you are in love with your work, congratulations, you have it all!
    Happy Monday!
  • What did I learn today?<br/>
It turns out that I'm not addicted to alcohol... I'm addicted to hangovers!
    What did I learn today?
    It turns out that I'm not addicted to alcohol... I'm addicted to hangovers!
  • Bored?<br/>
Broke?<br/>
Do you find yourself with over 35 spare hours to fill every week?<br/>
Would you like to earn hundreds of pounds every month?<br/>
Then get a job like the rest of us, you lazy twat!
    Bored?
    Broke?
    Do you find yourself with over 35 spare hours to fill every week?
    Would you like to earn hundreds of pounds every month?
    Then get a job like the rest of us, you lazy twat!
  • My wife gets annoyed if I mess with her red wine, so I've added fruit and lemonade to it and now she's Sangria than ever before!
    My wife gets annoyed if I mess with her red wine, so I've added fruit and lemonade to it and now she's Sangria than ever before!
  • I asked 100 women `What shampoo do you use whilst showering?`<br/>
98% of them asked me to get out of the shower!
    I asked 100 women "What shampoo do you use whilst showering?"
    98% of them asked me to get out of the shower!
  • There are only 3 things that always tell the truth.<br/>

1. Young Children<br/>
2. Drunks<br/>
3. Leggings
    There are only 3 things that always tell the truth.
    1. Young Children
    2. Drunks
    3. Leggings
  • When a woman says `We need to talk`.<br/>
Why is it never about sports?
    When a woman says "We need to talk".
    Why is it never about sports?