• I hate the part of the morning where I have to actually get out of bed and participate in real life!
    I hate the part of the morning where I have to actually get out of bed and participate in real life!
  • You never realize how ugly you are until you have to stare at yourself in the mirror while getting a haircut for 30 minutes!
    You never realize how ugly you are until you have to stare at yourself in the mirror while getting a haircut for 30 minutes!
  • My wife's left me because I've eaten far too much chocolate over the Christmas period. <br/>
I think this calls for a celebration!
    My wife's left me because I've eaten far too much chocolate over the Christmas period.
    I think this calls for a celebration!
  • Absence speaks more than people think.<br/>
You need to disappear for a while for people to truly appreciate your presence!
    Absence speaks more than people think.
    You need to disappear for a while for people to truly appreciate your presence!
  • The size of your problems is nothing compared with your ability to solve them. Don't overestimate your problems and underestimate yourself!
    The size of your problems is nothing compared with your ability to solve them. Don't overestimate your problems and underestimate yourself!
  • Every struggle in your past has shaped you into the person you are today. Take God's hand and step into your future without fear.<br/>
Have a happy Monday!
    Every struggle in your past has shaped you into the person you are today. Take God's hand and step into your future without fear.
    Have a happy Monday!
  • You can't make everybody happy.<br/>
You must understand, you're human and not beer!
    You can't make everybody happy.
    You must understand, you're human and not beer!
  • Friendship - a ship that sails even in shallow waters of adversity!
    Friendship - a ship that sails even in shallow waters of adversity!
  • Winters - the time of the year when you have an acceptable excuse to blame your laziness!
    Winters - the time of the year when you have an acceptable excuse to blame your laziness!
  • Stupidity - when people enjoy at your expense and you think they're happy in your company!
    Stupidity - when people enjoy at your expense and you think they're happy in your company!