• Everyone appreciates your honesty, until you're honest with them, then you're an asshole.
    Everyone appreciates your honesty, until you're honest with them, then you're an asshole.
    ~ George Carlin
  • Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
    Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
    ~ George Carlin
  • Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
    Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
    ~ George Carlin
    Law
  • The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.
    The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.
    ~ George Carlin