|Husband (romantically): I don't need dinner tonight, you look like a full course meal.|
Wife: Are you calling me fat?
Moral: Women are difficult to understand!
|My wife and I have a severe cold.|
Only difference is that she has completed all chores, dropped the kids to school and now going out for grocery shopping, while I'm lying on the bed dying!
|Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice bottle for 2 hours?|
Because it said 'concentrate'!
|Jeeto: Communication is the most important thing in a relationship.|
Santa: True, so tell me what's wrong?
|Santa: I haven't made any bad decisions since the day I got married.|
Santa: Because I'm married and I'm not allowed to make my own decisions!
|Girl: Ok f9, I'll talk 2 u t9i8 w8 4 me.|
Boy: Didi Hindi Ya Angrezi Mein Baat Kar Lo. Maths Hamari Bachpan Se Hi Weak Hai!
|Today I realized that when your wife forgives you easily for your mistakes, she has better plans to take the revenge!|
|Santa: That's the fifth time I've had to replace the clutch on this car.|
Jeeto: Don't blame me for that. I never use it!
|Santa: Honey, what's that look in your eyes?Jeeto: Your future.|
Santa: How cute, but for a second it looked like you wanted to kill me.
Jeeto: Absolutely, that's your future!
|Vacation is for 4 days and I need 4 outfits. But I packed 35, just to be safe.|
~ My wife