• Therapy is a software update. Surgery is a hardware upgrade!
    Therapy is a software update. Surgery is a hardware upgrade!
  • If you're afraid to check your account balance, you probably need to check your account balance!
    If you're afraid to check your account balance, you probably need to check your account balance!
  • In this generation, people ignore each other to get each other's attention!
    In this generation, people ignore each other to get each other's attention!
  • There needs to be an alarm app where every time you snooze it, it donates a certain amount of money to a charity of your choice!
    There needs to be an alarm app where every time you snooze it, it donates a certain amount of money to a charity of your choice!
  • Grades don't measure intelligence and age doesn't define maturity!
    Grades don't measure intelligence and age doesn't define maturity!
  • Sleep is like a drug addiction. We physically depend on it and become angry and even depressed when we don't get enough of it!
    Sleep is like a drug addiction. We physically depend on it and become angry and even depressed when we don't get enough of it!
  • The internet almost killed off the postal service with email and then made it more needed than ever with online delivery!
    The internet almost killed off the postal service with email and then made it more needed than ever with online delivery!
  • It's fine to say nine hundred or eleven hundred, but say ten hundred and you sound like a moron!
    It's fine to say nine hundred or eleven hundred, but say ten hundred and you sound like a moron!
  • The grass is no longer greener on the other side because of global warming!
    The grass is no longer greener on the other side because of global warming!
  • We live in a world where you want to get sick or hurt so you can relax for once!
    We live in a world where you want to get sick or hurt so you can relax for once!