When people say "Call me if you need anything" the word "Don't" is silent!
|The only time people give 'Titanic pose' these days is while getting "Security Check"!|
|I have tons of "will power", what I really need is "won't power"!|
|I don't know why I always put my music on shuffle and then get annoyed when it doesn't play the songs I want!|
|Have you ever felt that days are long, years are short!|
|Before criticizing people, walk a mile in their shoes.|
Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and you'll have their shoes as well!
|You spend your entire childhood being told not to talk to strangers but as an adult it's one of the most important things you have to do!|
|Apparently, there is bipartisan movement in the US Senate to legalize marijuana for arthritis treatment.|
In other words, there is a joint support for joint support for joint support!
|Happiness is finding old pictures of friends on Facebook and saving them in gallery thinking how you can destroy their lives anytime in future!|
|One thing I like about online shopping is that nobody judges you if you leave the app without buying anything!|