• Yesterday, a clown held open the door for me. It was a nice jester!
    Yesterday, a clown held open the door for me. It was a nice jester!
  • True laziness is getting excited when a plan gets cancelled!
    True laziness is getting excited when a plan gets cancelled!
  • I don't like meeting my friends from school and college because they remind me of my failures in life!
    I don't like meeting my friends from school and college because they remind me of my failures in life!
  • Now that I'm in debt, I'm a collectors' item.
    Now that I'm in debt, I'm a collectors' item.
  • Save face - keep the lower half of it shut.
    Save face - keep the lower half of it shut.
  • The light at the end of the tunnel - are the front lights of a train.
    The light at the end of the tunnel - are the front lights of a train.
  • Shoe-makers are known to be sole people.
    Shoe-makers are known to be sole people.
  • I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds.  People move out of the way much faster now!
    I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now!
  • Today a movie hero is someone who could sit through a double feature.
    Today a movie hero is someone who could sit through a double feature.
  • I'm struggling under the weight of a superiority complex- it belongs to my boss.
    I'm struggling under the weight of a superiority complex- it belongs to my boss.