• I regret choosing to be an accountant.<br/>
I thought `double entry` was something else!
    I regret choosing to be an accountant.
    I thought "double entry" was something else!
  • No one cleans better than a man expecting to get laid!
    No one cleans better than a man expecting to get laid!
  • Kid 1: Penchod<br/>
Kid 2: Penchod<br/>
Wife: Kuch Bolenge Aap Inko?<br/>
Husband: Bhenchod Hota Hai!<br/>
Wife: Woh Pen Ke Liye Lad Rahe Hain!
    Kid 1: Penchod
    Kid 2: Penchod
    Wife: Kuch Bolenge Aap Inko?
    Husband: Bhenchod Hota Hai!
    Wife: Woh Pen Ke Liye Lad Rahe Hain!
  • My bachelor friend told me that he hasn't had sex in such a long time that he's beginning to feel like he's married!
    My bachelor friend told me that he hasn't had sex in such a long time that he's beginning to feel like he's married!
  • 1st year of marriage: Great sex! Now let's cuddle and fall asleep.<br/>
10th year of marriage: Sex? We just did that in April!
    1st year of marriage: Great sex! Now let's cuddle and fall asleep.
    10th year of marriage: Sex? We just did that in April!
  • I asked my girlfriend why she never blinks during sex.<br/>
She said, `There isn't just enough time!`
    I asked my girlfriend why she never blinks during sex.
    She said, "There isn't just enough time!"
  • The world is not full of assholes, but they are strategically placed so that you'll come across one every day!
    The world is not full of assholes, but they are strategically placed so that you'll come across one every day!
  • Gupt Gyan:<br/>
1st Girl: Pata Nahi Kyun Sar Ke Baal Bahut Jaldi Grey Ho Jate Hain, Magar Neeche Ke Nahi.<br/>
2nd Girl: Pagli, Neeche Ke Baal Sar Ke Baal Se 14 Saal Chote Hote Hain. Aur Neeche Khushiyan Hi Khushiyan Hain... Upar Sirf Tension!
    Gupt Gyan:
    1st Girl: Pata Nahi Kyun Sar Ke Baal Bahut Jaldi Grey Ho Jate Hain, Magar Neeche Ke Nahi.
    2nd Girl: Pagli, Neeche Ke Baal Sar Ke Baal Se 14 Saal Chote Hote Hain. Aur Neeche Khushiyan Hi Khushiyan Hain... Upar Sirf Tension!
  • Drinker: There is only one similarity between me & you.<br/>
Non-drinker: And what's that?<br/>
Drinker: Hum Dono Ek Dusre Ki Nazar Mein Chutiye Hain!
    Drinker: There is only one similarity between me & you.
    Non-drinker: And what's that?
    Drinker: Hum Dono Ek Dusre Ki Nazar Mein Chutiye Hain!
  • Girls:<br/>

1980 - Don't Touch<br/>
1990 - Touch But Don't Kiss<br/>
2000 - Kiss But Kuch Mat Karna<br/>
2010 - Sab Karlo But Kisi Ko Batana Mat<br/>
2020 - Sab Karo Warna Bata Dungi Tum Kuch Nahi Kar Sakte!
    Girls:
    1980 - Don't Touch
    1990 - Touch But Don't Kiss
    2000 - Kiss But Kuch Mat Karna
    2010 - Sab Karlo But Kisi Ko Batana Mat
    2020 - Sab Karo Warna Bata Dungi Tum Kuch Nahi Kar Sakte!