|Marriage vows in short:|
I won't fuck other people, but I'll fuck you and your life!
Roses are Red, Sky is Blue; You're beautiful, I love you!
Roses are Dead, I have Flu; Don't eat my head, F**k you!
|It is amazing how a nice pair of boobs can hide serious flaws and signs of mental illness until after you marry them!|
|This is absolute partiality:|
If she has a headache, she is tired;
If you have a headache, you don't love her any more!
|How do you know when your honeymoon is over?|
When he no longer smiles as he scrapes the burnt toast!
|How do you know if your wife is dead?|
Sex is the same but you get the remote!
|I've been married to my wife ten years today. Having sex with just one person in ten years is pure dedication.|
I don't know how she does it!
|Wife : Shall we try different positions tonight?|
Husband excitedly, "Yeh, sure why not?"
Wife: OK, you stand at the sink and wash dishes and I'll be on the sofa and watch TV!
Moral : All jokes are not dirty...
|Men like the women's body;|
Women like the men's brain.
That's why they both FUCK what they like!
|My wife and I have been together for such a long time that we finish each other's sentences|
by simply adding "you fuckin idiot".