• Before you start popping the bubble wrap from your next Amazon package... remember that air in it is from China!
    Before you start popping the bubble wrap from your next Amazon package... remember that air in it is from China!
  • My wife loves me so much.<br/>
First, she renewed my life insurance policy for a higher sum and then bought me a solo vacation package to China!
    My wife loves me so much.
    First, she renewed my life insurance policy for a higher sum and then bought me a solo vacation package to China!
  • What's the difference between Congress and a Toilet?<br/>
A toilet has a seat!
    What's the difference between Congress and a Toilet?
    A toilet has a seat!
  • What did I learn today?<br/>
Every invention takes time to develop and to work out the kinks. I mean, even Kleenex was nothing to sneeze at in the beginning!
    What did I learn today?
    Every invention takes time to develop and to work out the kinks. I mean, even Kleenex was nothing to sneeze at in the beginning!
  • I have reached that stage of my life where I am not bothered about:<br/>
Rose day,<br/>
Teddy day,<br/>
Kiss day, or even Valentine's day.<br/>
The only day that effects me is...<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
.<br/>
Dry Day!
    I have reached that stage of my life where I am not bothered about:
    Rose day,
    Teddy day,
    Kiss day, or even Valentine's day.
    The only day that effects me is...
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Dry Day!
  • When everything seems dark, consider... you may be the light!
    When everything seems dark, consider... you may be the light!
  • Unlike Milk:<br/>
It is perfectly acceptable to cry over spilled beer!
    Unlike Milk:
    It is perfectly acceptable to cry over spilled beer!
  • Marriage is so fun that I had to apologize for something I did in my wife's dream!
    Marriage is so fun that I had to apologize for something I did in my wife's dream!
  • Today I realized that erasers slowly sacrifice their lives for our mistakes!
    Today I realized that erasers slowly sacrifice their lives for our mistakes!
  • Being an introvert allows me to care about humanity and despise human beings, simultaneously!
    Being an introvert allows me to care about humanity and despise human beings, simultaneously!