• The trouble with born-again Christians is that they are an even bigger pain the second time around.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • Parking is such sweet sorrow.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • Middle age begins with the first mortgage and ends when you drop dead.
    ~ Herb Caen
    Age
  • We have football weather during baseball season, and baseball weather during football season.
    ~ Herb Caen, on San Francisco weather
  • Like a camel, I can go without a drink for seven days -- and have on several horrible occasions.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • Logic has no answer to passion.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • I hope I go to heaven, and when I do, I'm going to do what every San Franciscan does when he gets there. He looks around and says, 'It ain't bad, but it ain't San Francisco'."
    ~ Herb Caen
  • A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • Martinis are like breasts, one isn't enough, and three is too many.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • San Franciscans have a bond of self-satisfaction bordering on smugness.
    ~ Herb Caen
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