|If you don't make enough money to go on vacation, just get drunk this weekend until you don't know where you are!|
Have a Nice Weekend!
|Why was the man fired from the orange juice factory?|
Because he couldn't concentrate!
|The Sentimental Growth Story:|
Me: Can you please grow?
Salary: Don't even dream!
Tummy: Bro, anything for you!
|Interviewer: So, tell me about yourself.|
Candidate: I'm unemployed!
|A woman saying "correct me if I'm wrong" is a trap!|
|LinkedIn: Where high school acquaintances proudly show you they eventually grew up and became employable!|
|Frustrated by my mom's never-ending scolding, one day I went to her...|
Me to my Mom: Mom am I adopted?
Mom: Of course not! Why would we choose you?
|Today I donated a watch, a phone and my wallet to a poor guy.|
You can't imagine the happiness I felt as I saw him putting his gun back in his pocket!
|Sometimes I forget just how much I hate people, then I log onto social media and I'm like oh yeah...|
|When your mind says give up, hope whispers one more try!|