• I drink very little.<br/>
And when I drink little, I become a different person & that different person drinks a lot!
    I drink very little.
    And when I drink little, I become a different person & that different person drinks a lot!
  • The lottery gives you a 1 in a million chance you won't go to work tomorrow.<br/>
Alcohol gives you 1 in 5!
    The lottery gives you a 1 in a million chance you won't go to work tomorrow.
    Alcohol gives you 1 in 5!
  • What did I learn today?<br/>
It turns out that I'm not addicted to alcohol... I'm addicted to hangovers!
    What did I learn today?
    It turns out that I'm not addicted to alcohol... I'm addicted to hangovers!
  • I can't really walk the walk or talk the talk but if you need me to drink the drink them I am all yours!
    I can't really walk the walk or talk the talk but if you need me to drink the drink them I am all yours!
  • World Cup 2018 result update:<br/>
VODKA 5 - PETROL 0
    World Cup 2018 result update:
    VODKA 5 - PETROL 0
  • Drinking pineapple juice will improve your complexion and adding rum will improve others' looks!
    Drinking pineapple juice will improve your complexion and adding rum will improve others' looks!
  • Weekend Spiritual Quote:<br/>
It is better to sit in a bar thinking about God than to sit in a temple thinking about Whisky!
    Weekend Spiritual Quote:
    It is better to sit in a bar thinking about God than to sit in a temple thinking about Whisky!
  • Girl: Me or alcohol?<br/>
Alcohol: Choose her, I know you will come back to me later!
    Girl: Me or alcohol?
    Alcohol: Choose her, I know you will come back to me later!
  • I hate when people ask me what I do for fun because there is no classy way to say `binge drink`!
    I hate when people ask me what I do for fun because there is no classy way to say "binge drink"!
  • Alcohol is a very useful solution.<br/>
One treats outside wounds by rubbing alcohol;<br/>
And inside wounds by drinking alcohol!
    Alcohol is a very useful solution.
    One treats outside wounds by rubbing alcohol;
    And inside wounds by drinking alcohol!