|Kids probably don't realise it yet, but pretending to be asleep is a skill that will come in handy for the rest of their lives!|
|The position of your hands is very important when playing golf.|
I position mine to cover up my scorecard!
|Yawns are just silent screams for coffee!|
|I thought that pulling the shell off my racing snail would help it move faster.|
If anything it became more sluggish!
|Taxes are just a monthly subscription to live in a country!|
|Your great grandchildren will probably do a history project on your social media posts.|
So post wisely!
|Doctor: What do you do when you feel stressed?|
Patient: I go to the temple.
Doctor: Good... does it help?
Patient: No... I mix-up all the shoes kept outside and watch people more stressed than me!
|Why was the broom late for work?|
Because he overswept!
|I have a new phone charger but I also have a teenage son which means I somehow have an old charger and he has a new one!|
|I love pressing F5 because it's so refreshing!|