• Ancient Egyptian Architect: `Do you know how to build a pyramid?`<br/>
Ancient Egyptian Builder: `Well, err yeah, upto a point!`
    Ancient Egyptian Architect: "Do you know how to build a pyramid?"
    Ancient Egyptian Builder: "Well, err yeah, upto a point!"
  • Doctor: Can we talk about your weight?<br/>
Certainly. It was about 20 minutes, but at least the chairs didn't break this time!
    Doctor: Can we talk about your weight?
    Certainly. It was about 20 minutes, but at least the chairs didn't break this time!
  • I quit my job at the concrete plant.<br/>
My job was getting harder & harder!
    I quit my job at the concrete plant.
    My job was getting harder & harder!
  • I told my boss, `Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues.`<br/>
Boss: Hard drive?<br/>
Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop!
    I told my boss, `Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues.`
    Boss: Hard drive?
    Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop!
  • A boat builder is proudly showing his young son the family forest. He turns to him and says...<br/>
Son, one day all this will be oars!
    A boat builder is proudly showing his young son the family forest. He turns to him and says...
    Son, one day all this will be oars!
  • I am not addicted to social media.<br/>
I just use it when I have time.<br/>
Like, Lunch time, Dinner time, This time, That time, All the time!
    I am not addicted to social media.
    I just use it when I have time.
    Like, Lunch time, Dinner time, This time, That time, All the time!
  • I had to apologize to my wife today and had to promise her that I'll not do anything again in her dreams that could upset her again!
    I had to apologize to my wife today and had to promise her that I'll not do anything again in her dreams that could upset her again!
  • Interviewer: What are your strengths?<br/>
Boy: I fall in love easily.<br/>
Interviewer: Okay, what are your weaknesses?<br/>
Boy: Those blue eyes of yours!
    Interviewer: What are your strengths?
    Boy: I fall in love easily.
    Interviewer: Okay, what are your weaknesses?
    Boy: Those blue eyes of yours!
  • Considering my precarious financial position, I need to maintain social distancing from my debit and credit cards too!
    Considering my precarious financial position, I need to maintain social distancing from my debit and credit cards too!
  • People associate wearing glasses with being smart, but you have to fail a test to get them!
    People associate wearing glasses with being smart, but you have to fail a test to get them!