|Doctor: What do you do when you feel stressed?|
Patient: I go to the temple.
Doctor: Good... does it help?
Patient: No... I mix-up all the shoes kept outside and watch people more stressed than me!
|Why was the broom late for work?|
Because he overswept!
|I have a new phone charger but I also have a teenage son which means I somehow have an old charger and he has a new one!|
|Bought my mum a fridge for her Birthday.|
You should've seen her face light up when she opened it!
|You know what makes me smile? |
|Police are on the lookout for a cross-eyed burglar.|
They said, "if you see him peering through your window, please warn the people next-door!"
|Marrying a girl because you got her pregnant is a real life "you break it, you buy it" scenario!|
|One guy updated his Facebook status:|
"Last night, even after having 7 drinks I felt confident to drive, but l acted responsibly & took an Uber."
400 Likes and 40 Comments. But the best comment was:
"Abey Saale, Tu Uber Se Geya Kidhar? Party Toh Tere Ghar Pe Hi Thi!"
|Pro Tip for Dating!|
Swallow magnets to become attractive!
|Son: Dad, what's an alcoholic?|
Dad: Do you see those four trees? Well, an alcoholic would see eight.
Son: But Dad, I only see two!