Funny SMS

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What is the most common crime in China?
Identity Fraud!
At a playhouse theatre in Boston: Fix this toilet!
The response: We're actors, not plumbers.
The response to the response: Then act like plumbers!
Boss to his Friend: The times are really bad... my Secretary resigned yesterday. 
Friend: Why? 
Boss: She caught me kissing my wife!
Boss to his Friend: The times are really bad... my Secretary resigned yesterday.
Friend: Why?
Boss: She caught me kissing my wife!
An Innovative tagline outside a photo studio:
We can shoot your wife and also frame your mother-in-law!
Man: Darling, if you marry me I'll satisfy your smallest wishes.
Lady: And what do you propose to do about the big ones?
Boy: Mom, please give me a glass of water. 
Mom: You come and drink it yourself. 
Boy: Please Mom... 
Mom: If you repeat, I'll slap you. 
Boy: When you come to slap me, bring water for me!
Boy: Mom, please give me a glass of water.
Mom: You come and drink it yourself.
Boy: Please Mom...
Mom: If you repeat, I'll slap you.
Boy: When you come to slap me, bring water for me!
The idea of "copy and paste" came when its inventor visited China!
On a dark night near an ocean in Africa, a black boy very romantically asked his black girlfriend,
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"Darling, are you there?"
A girl returned home from a party and told her mother a young man had kissed her. "How many times did he kiss you?" asked her mother.
Looking up into his face, the girl replied: Mother, I came to confess, not to boast!
The only thing in the world, a daughter-in-law and a mother-in-law agree upon is that her hubby and her son respectively should have married someone else!
The only thing in the world, a daughter-in-law and a mother-in-law agree upon is that her hubby and her son respectively should have married someone else!

Quotes

Angels, roll the rock away;
Death, yield up thy mighty prey:
See, He rises from the tomb,
Glowing with immortal bloom.

Trivia

'Dreamt' is the only word in the English language that ends with 'MT'.

Graffiti

Work in bakery if you knead dough.