|Interviewer: What drives you?|
Candidate: The bus mostly.
Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning?
Candidate: Missing the bus!
|While people are worried about depositing more than 2.50 lakhs in their accounts.|
I am receiving notifications from my bank to maintain the minimum balance!
|How to make Rose Milk:|
1. Take one liter of milk & boil it.
2. Add sugar to the milk as per taste.
3. Take 2000 Rupees new note & dip it into milk two to three times.
Rose milk is ready!
|Dominos Pizza Mein Phone Aata Hai.|
Customer: One Small Pizza Extra Toppings Ke Saath Bhej Do.
Dominos Guy: Ji Sir, Please Address Bata Dijiye.
Customer: Pitampura State Bank Ki Line Mein 22nd Number, Green Shirt!
|At a restaurant:|
Girlfriend: I'll just have a salad.
Waiter: And for you, Sir?
Boyfriend: I'll be giving her half of my food!
|My first instinct when I see an animal is to say 'Hello'.|
My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact & hope it goes away!
|If you drop food on the floor in public, it's proper etiquette to look around and see who noticed before shoving it in your mouth!|
|Who Says, 'Nothing is Impossible.'? |
From past few days, I am doing nothing and trust me it is possible!
|Guy1: If I had ten chocolates and you took one, what would you have?|
Guy2: 1 chocolate.
Guy1: No, a black eye and a broken hand!
|People who think they can run away from their problems have obviously never farted on a treadmill!|