|Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you, and feel glad that you are alive?|
I did and apparently will not be allowed on this airline again!
|A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.|
When it came time to pay,
The skunk didn't have a scent;
The deer didn't have a buck;
So they put the meal on the duck's bill!
|When I was young I used to dream that... at the age of 50+, I'll have:|
A big Penthouse.
Ferrari & Lamborgini
Farm in the hills
Island in the Carribean
I am proud to inform you that at least one dream has come true.
I am 50+
|I work with a Chinese guy called Kim and one time at a works function, we were having a drink and I said to him "Do you ever get fed up of us Westerners saying that all Chinese people look the same"?|
He replied, "Kim's at the bar getting drinks, I'm his wife!"
|Uncle: What do you do?|
Guy: Main Dard Mein Doobe Logon Ko Dawai Pilata Hun.
Uncle: Doctor Ban Gaye Ho Kya?
Guy: Nahi Uncle, Bar Mein Waiter Hun!
|Diwali Ka Kya Plan Hai?|
Pichli Baar Dubai Nahi Gaye The Iss Baar Europe Nahi Jayenge!
|She: We are over. Parents Se Darr Lagta Hai.|
After a week she gets a new boyfriend.
Boy (In KBC style): Bahut Hi Umda Kheli Aap... Taaliyan Bajti Rehni Chahiye!
|Waiter: Plain Rice or GST Rice?|
Jaitley: What's GST?
Waiter: Ahh, that's complex to explain!
|Punjabis on Weekdays: Bura Time|
Punjabis on Weekends: Buraaaaah Time!
|Yesterday, after finishing my office work I left for home in my car. On the way, I saw my neighbour walking on the footpath. I offered him a lift. He politely refused to say, "He is in a hurry"!|