• I told my dad to embrace his mistakes.<br/>
He gave me a hug!
    I told my dad to embrace his mistakes.
    He gave me a hug!
  • When one door closes, leave the other door closed too. The A.C. is on!
    When one door closes, leave the other door closed too. The A.C. is on!
  • All I'm saying is a good woman is like a good stance.<br/>
Taken!
    All I'm saying is a good woman is like a good stance.
    Taken!
  • Me: Sorry boss can't come in today my car has broken down.<br/>
Boss: What about the bus?<br/>
Me: I don't have a bus!
    Me: Sorry boss can't come in today my car has broken down.
    Boss: What about the bus?
    Me: I don't have a bus!
  • Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, `What kind of music do you like?` <br/>
The other replies, `I'm a big metal fan`!
    Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?"
    The other replies, "I'm a big metal fan"!
  • My friend's wife left him last week. She said she was going out for milk and never came back.<br/>
I asked him how he was coping.<br/>
He said, `Not bad. I've been using some of that powdered stuff`
    My friend's wife left him last week. She said she was going out for milk and never came back.
    I asked him how he was coping.
    He said, "Not bad. I've been using some of that powdered stuff"
  • God: Welcome to Heaven! Hope you had a good life!<br/>
Guy: Woh Sab Theek Hai, Yeh 'Marriages are made in Heaven team' Kaun Handle Karta Hai, Usse Baat Karni Hai!
    God: Welcome to Heaven! Hope you had a good life!
    Guy: Woh Sab Theek Hai, Yeh 'Marriages are made in Heaven team' Kaun Handle Karta Hai, Usse Baat Karni Hai!
  • Boss: My door is always open.<br/>
Me: I know and it makes it really hard for me to leave work early!
    Boss: My door is always open.
    Me: I know and it makes it really hard for me to leave work early!
  • I went to a busy pub last night dressed as a tennis ball.<br/>
I got served straight away!
    I went to a busy pub last night dressed as a tennis ball.
    I got served straight away!
  • My wife tripped and spilled the laundry basket all over the floor.<br/>
I watched it all unfold!
    My wife tripped and spilled the laundry basket all over the floor.
    I watched it all unfold!