|So apparently, if you're late drinking out with your buddies, wrapping yourself up in a blanket and telling your wife that you were just rescued by the coast guard doesn't work if you live in a landlocked country!|
|Flu season is around. Remember to keep the alcohol level up.|
Because a shot in the glass is better than a shot in the a**!
|The reason why moms always know where everything is...|
because they're the ones moving our things all the time!
|Everyone told Sam not to sing, but Samsung anyway!|
|The Sentimental Growth Story:|
Me: Can you please grow?
Salary: Don't even dream.
Stomach: Anything for you!
|I just realized that you should not make fun of thin people, they'll stab you with their elbows!|
|Earth Ke Mummy-Daddy Hote Toh Earth Ko Kitni Daant Padti.|
Saara Din Ghoomti Rehti Hai!
|Saw a man hanging out of his balcony.|
I shouted "Don't do it. You are not alone, we all have the same problems."
He replied: Are you on Vodafone, too?
|Judge to Chidambaram: What do you have to say in your defense?|
Chidambaram: Milord, I have joined BJP.
Judge: Well then case dismissed!
|If Imran Khan could resolve disputes with dialogue... he wouldn't have married 3 times!|