• I have more conversations in my head than I do in real life!
    I have more conversations in my head than I do in real life!
  • Coffee makes you hyper, but coffee shops are designed for people to chill, whereas alcohol is a depressant but bars and clubs are designed for people to be energetic.<br/>
Choice is yours!
    Coffee makes you hyper, but coffee shops are designed for people to chill, whereas alcohol is a depressant but bars and clubs are designed for people to be energetic.
    Choice is yours!
  • Those who can't even eat 'Bhindi' and 'Lauki' are saying...<br/>
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Baby Tum Baat Nahi Karogi Toh Zeher Kha Lunga!
    Those who can't even eat 'Bhindi' and 'Lauki' are saying...
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    Baby Tum Baat Nahi Karogi Toh Zeher Kha Lunga!
  • Always snatch and eat one third of your child's chocolate and ice-cream.<br/>
This will prepare them to pay income tax when they grow up. You can even take the first bite to prepare them for TDS!
    Always snatch and eat one third of your child's chocolate and ice-cream.
    This will prepare them to pay income tax when they grow up. You can even take the first bite to prepare them for TDS!
  • A foreigner comes to Kashi, visits the Viswanath's temple and all the ghats.<br/>
Then he buys a 'VIBHUTHI' packet from a boy selling on the street.<br/>
Foreigner then asks what is its expiry date.<br/>
Boy replies looking surprised: `It's made from expired people and when you apply on your forehead it increases your expiry date!`
    A foreigner comes to Kashi, visits the Viswanath's temple and all the ghats.
    Then he buys a 'VIBHUTHI' packet from a boy selling on the street.
    Foreigner then asks what is its expiry date.
    Boy replies looking surprised: "It's made from expired people and when you apply on your forehead it increases your expiry date!"
  • My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed birthday party...<br/>
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So I made her and all her friends clean the house!
    My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed birthday party...
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    So I made her and all her friends clean the house!
  • Barley - makes BEER.<br/>
Corn - makes WHISKEY.<br/>
Grapes -  make WINE.<br/>
Potatoes - make VODKA.<br/>
Agave - makes TEQUILA.<br/>
Rice - makes SAKE.<br/>
Sugarcane - makes RUM.<br/>
You can't get drunk without FARMERS! <br/>
So Save FARMERS!
    Barley - makes BEER.
    Corn - makes WHISKEY.
    Grapes - make WINE.
    Potatoes - make VODKA.
    Agave - makes TEQUILA.
    Rice - makes SAKE.
    Sugarcane - makes RUM.
    You can't get drunk without FARMERS!
    So Save FARMERS!
  • Someone asked the dying Priest: Any Desire?<br/>
Priest: Nun!
    Someone asked the dying Priest: Any Desire?
    Priest: Nun!
  • Robbery at a multiplex:<br/>
Police: Kitne Ka Nuksaan Hua?<br/>
Manager: 2 Lakh Ka!<br/>
Police: Kya Le Gaye Chor?<br/>
Manager: 2 Large Coke, 2 Large Popcorn, 2 Burgers and 2 Nachos!
    Robbery at a multiplex:
    Police: Kitne Ka Nuksaan Hua?
    Manager: 2 Lakh Ka!
    Police: Kya Le Gaye Chor?
    Manager: 2 Large Coke, 2 Large Popcorn, 2 Burgers and 2 Nachos!
  • Someone asked me on Facebook: Are you a beach person or a mountain person?<br/>
I replied: I'm a poor person!
    Someone asked me on Facebook: Are you a beach person or a mountain person?
    I replied: I'm a poor person!