|I have more conversations in my head than I do in real life!|
|Coffee makes you hyper, but coffee shops are designed for people to chill, whereas alcohol is a depressant but bars and clubs are designed for people to be energetic.|
Choice is yours!
|Those who can't even eat 'Bhindi' and 'Lauki' are saying...|
Baby Tum Baat Nahi Karogi Toh Zeher Kha Lunga!
|Always snatch and eat one third of your child's chocolate and ice-cream.|
This will prepare them to pay income tax when they grow up. You can even take the first bite to prepare them for TDS!
|A foreigner comes to Kashi, visits the Viswanath's temple and all the ghats.|
Then he buys a 'VIBHUTHI' packet from a boy selling on the street.
Foreigner then asks what is its expiry date.
Boy replies looking surprised: "It's made from expired people and when you apply on your forehead it increases your expiry date!"
|My daughter wanted a Cinderella themed birthday party...|
So I made her and all her friends clean the house!
|Barley - makes BEER.|
Corn - makes WHISKEY.
Grapes - make WINE.
Potatoes - make VODKA.
Agave - makes TEQUILA.
Rice - makes SAKE.
Sugarcane - makes RUM.
You can't get drunk without FARMERS!
So Save FARMERS!
|Someone asked the dying Priest: Any Desire?|
|Robbery at a multiplex:|
Police: Kitne Ka Nuksaan Hua?
Manager: 2 Lakh Ka!
Police: Kya Le Gaye Chor?
Manager: 2 Large Coke, 2 Large Popcorn, 2 Burgers and 2 Nachos!
|Someone asked me on Facebook: Are you a beach person or a mountain person?|
I replied: I'm a poor person!