|To sleep, you trick yourself into thinking you're asleep.|
To wake up, you trick yourself into thinking you don't hate life!
|Girl 1: Why do women need a husband?|
Girl 2: Because so many things go wrong everyday and you can't blame God!
|I have decided to leave my past behind, so if I owe you money...|
I am sorry but I have moved on!
|The longer you wait, the hotter you date!|
|After using all of social networking apps I've realized that alcohol is still the best way to connect with friends!|
|My boss is always in his character.|
A female colleague posted the picture of her newly born kid and boss commented,
"I was expecting a better output"!
|For years & years... I have been incorrectly hearing this advertisement for cough & cold:|
Whiskey Goli Lo Khich Khich Door Karo!
|What is the computer's favorite food?|
|Carrots may be good for your eyes, but booze will double your vision!|
|Santa: Mera Order Abhi Tak Kyon Nahi Aaya, Ullu Ke Patthe?|
Customer Care: Please Sir, Pehle Aap Namarta Se Baat Kijiye.
Santa: OK! Karwao!