• Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them!
    Dating is collecting information about someone until you realize you don't like them!
  • Counting the number of hours left for me to get back to bed after waking up every day is my favourite hobby!
    Counting the number of hours left for me to get back to bed after waking up every day is my favourite hobby!
  • My extensive research has emphatically deuced that it is religion that divides people and humor that unites them!
    My extensive research has emphatically deuced that it is religion that divides people and humor that unites them!
  • Even mutual funds have maturity but some people don't!
    Even mutual funds have maturity but some people don't!
  • As a kid, I didn't want to sleep cause I was scared of nightmares. Now, all I want to do is sleep cause life is worse than any nightmare!
    As a kid, I didn't want to sleep cause I was scared of nightmares. Now, all I want to do is sleep cause life is worse than any nightmare!
  • Have you ever thought that fire trucks are actually water trucks!
    Have you ever thought that fire trucks are actually water trucks!
  • Maximum truth has been told in bars with a glass of whiskey in hand and maximum lies have been told in courts with holy book in hand!
    Maximum truth has been told in bars with a glass of whiskey in hand and maximum lies have been told in courts with holy book in hand!
  • The most amazing thing about Google probably is that its creators couldn't use Google when creating it!
    The most amazing thing about Google probably is that its creators couldn't use Google when creating it!
  • Opportunities in my life are like those little kids who knock on the door in the night for fun and then run away!
    Opportunities in my life are like those little kids who knock on the door in the night for fun and then run away!
  • Childhood is just the 'free trial' edition of life. When it ends, you have to pay for the full version or else you'll lose everything!
    Childhood is just the 'free trial' edition of life. When it ends, you have to pay for the full version or else you'll lose everything!