Law and Lawyers SMS

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What's the problem with lawyer jokes?
Lawyers don't think they're funny, and no one else thinks they're jokes!
'You've been convicted 5 times of this offence - aren't you ashamed to own to that?'<br/>
'No, your honour. I don't think one ought to be ashamed of his convictions!'
"You've been convicted 5 times of this offence - aren't you ashamed to own to that?"
"No, your honour. I don't think one ought to be ashamed of his convictions!"
What is a contingent fee?
If the lawyer doesn't win your suit, he gets nothing;
And if the lawyer does win it, you get nothing!
The young couple sat at a night club and cooed heavily:<BR/>
Boy: We could get married easily. My father's a minister.<BR/>
Girl: Okay. Let's try it. My father's a lawyer!
The young couple sat at a night club and cooed heavily:
Boy: We could get married easily. My father's a minister.
Girl: Okay. Let's try it. My father's a lawyer!
A lawyer says that a dangerous year in married life is the first. Then follows the second, third, fourth, fifth and so on!
What's the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?
A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight!
Santa went to his lawyer after beating his wife. 
Lawyer: You'll be charged for cruelty? 
Santa: All right... but how much will they charge me?
Santa went to his lawyer after beating his wife.
Lawyer: You'll be charged for cruelty?
Santa: All right... but how much will they charge me?
Lawyer: Your honour, please grant me anticipatory bail. 
Judge: What have you done? 
Lawyer: Your Honour, I have hired a new secretary!
Lawyer: Your honour, please grant me anticipatory bail.
Judge: What have you done?
Lawyer: Your Honour, I have hired a new secretary!
You seem to be in some distress, said the kindly judge to the witness. Is anything the matter?
Well, your honour, said the witness, I swore to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, but every time I try, some lawyer objects!
Lawyer's Creed:
A man is innocent until proven broke!

Quotes

The good teacher discovers the natural gifts of his pupils and liberates them by the stimulating influence of the inspiration that he can impart. The true leader makes his followers twice the men they were before.

Trivia

Waheeda Rahman played both mother and lover to Amitabh Bachchan. She played the love interest of Big B in 'Adalat' (1976) and mother in 'Trishul' (1978).

Graffiti

Alimony - When two people make a mistake and one of them continues to pay for it!