The man who brags, "I run things in my house," usually refers to the lawn mower, washing machine, vacuum sweeper, baby carriage and the errands!
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Friend 1: My wife always has the last word.
Friend 2: You're lucky. Mine never gets to it!
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Bride: Mu hubby is perfectly wonderful to me, mother. He gives me everything I ask for.
Mother: That merely shows, my dear child, that you are not asking enough!
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Wife: I've got a lot of things I want to talk to you about...
Husband: Good. I'm glad to hear it. Usually you want to talk to me about a lot of things you haven't got!
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Boys have fun by teasing girls then girls cry for a few minutes;
And girls have fun by loving boys then boys cry for a lifetime!
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Wife: You don't love me any more. When you see me crying now, you don't ask why.
Husband: I'm awfully sorry, my dear, but these questions have already cost me such a lot of money!
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The Equation of Marriage:
7 Glances = 1 Smile
7 Smiles = 1 Meeting
7 Meetings = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposals = 1 Marriage
And that 1 marriage has 77777+ problems.
So beware of a glance!
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My wife doesn't mind me flirting with other women. She finds their rejection quite entertaining!
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Wife: I've bought you a beautiful surprise for your birthday, it has just arrived.
Husband: I am curious to see it.
Wife: Wait a minute and I will put it on.
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"What did you buy your husband for his birthday?"
"Well, knowing he wanted a diary, I bought him one that locked; he's so particular about his notes."
"And surely you bought something for yourself?"
"Oh, yes; I bought myself a duplicate key for the diary."
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