• For men marriage is like museum - you have to be quite and you can't really touch anything!
    For men marriage is like museum - you have to be quite and you can't really touch anything!
  • Son: The marriage vows say "till death do us part", so we are not married in heaven?
    Father: That's right son... because if we were still married, we'd be in hell!
  • A husband and wife were arguing over some issue.
    After heated arguments for a long time, wife finally said: Tell me dear, do you want to win or do you want to be happy?
    Argument ended!
  • Sometimes I wake up GRUMPY; other times
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    I let her sleep!
  • My wife must be a relative of Nathu Ram Godse. She's constantly eliminating the Gandhis from my wallet!
    My wife must be a relative of Nathu Ram Godse. She's constantly eliminating the Gandhis from my wallet!
  • Wife: Shall I prepare 'Sambhar' or 'Rasam' today?<br /> 
Husband: Make anything, we will name it later!
    Wife: Shall I prepare 'Sambhar' or 'Rasam' today?
    Husband: Make anything, we will name it later!
  • If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to?
  • How to find the perfect woman in two steps.
    1. Marry one!
    2. All other women will automatically look perfect!
  • The secrets of a Happy Marriage:<br/>
1. Go to Tools - Internet Options - Clear History - Delete Files - Delete Cookies!<br/>
2. Whatsapp Group Info - Delete Chat History - Delete Photos - Delete Videos!
    The secrets of a Happy Marriage:
    1. Go to Tools - Internet Options - Clear History - Delete Files - Delete Cookies!
    2. Whatsapp Group Info - Delete Chat History - Delete Photos - Delete Videos!
  • A drunk man arrives late at home. He knows his wife won't open the door, so he decides to pretend he bought her flowers & knocks at the door.
    Wife: Who is it?
    Drunk: I bring flowers for the pretty lady.
    Wife opens the door & says: Where are the flowers?
    Drunk: Where is the pretty lady? The guy is recovering from deep injuries!
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