|Marriage is fun:|
My wife and I had a two-hour fight about whether or not we were fighting!
|Roadside sobriety tests are scary.|
Last night, I was driving home with my wife and a cop stopped me and asked me if I were drunk. I said no. So he asked me when my wife's birthday is.
All three dates I said were wrong. I got fined by the police & my wife hasn't spoken to me since then!
|Some men climb Mt. Everest. Some men skydive. Some men wave surf.|
And here I am thinking for the last five hours how to ask my wife if I can go out with my friends!
|My wife is like poetry.|
And I don't understand poetry!
|My wife told me to ensure that I wear a dress that matches with hers at her cousin's wedding.|
I did exactly what I was told to. But still, she's mad at me.
And to make things worse, I feel so uncomfortable in this saree!
|My wife has a throat infection and the doctor advised her not to talk for the next three days.|
That doctor is my favorite person now!
|Therapist: Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is that true?|
Husband: To be honest, I never knew she sold flowers!
|Our kids are with my parents' house. So tonight my wife and I might indulge in something that we haven't done for a while.|
Sleep peacefully, that is!
|When I'm angry at my wife, I let her know my unhappiness by aggressively washing the dishes and mopping the floor!|
|Husband: Did you read the newspaper? As per the latest research, it has been found that 15% of women take medicines for mental illness.|
Wife: What's so special about this news?
Husband: This is a dangerous news.
Husband: This means 85% of women are roaming around without taking medicines!