• Husband: Tum Mujhe 'Aap' Keh Kar Bulaya Karo.<br/>
Wife: Shut Aap!
    Husband: Tum Mujhe 'Aap' Keh Kar Bulaya Karo.
    Wife: Shut Aap!
  • Very effective threat by wife in a new style:<br/>
The amount of time you'll spend on Facebook, Whatsapp and Twitter...<br/>
The equal amount of time I'll spend on Flipkart, Amazon and Snapdeal!<br/>
Husband went offline immediately!
    Very effective threat by wife in a new style:
    The amount of time you'll spend on Facebook, Whatsapp and Twitter...
    The equal amount of time I'll spend on Flipkart, Amazon and Snapdeal!
    Husband went offline immediately!
  • I read a book on marriage and it said, `You should treat your wife as you treated her on your 1st date`.<br/>
So I took her to dinner at a restaurant and then I dropped her at her parents' house!
    I read a book on marriage and it said, "You should treat your wife as you treated her on your 1st date".
    So I took her to dinner at a restaurant and then I dropped her at her parents' house!
  • The symptoms of EBOLA are:<br/>
Sweating, weakness, diarrhea and stomach pain.<br/>
A kind of feeling that a husband gets when he sees his wife going through his phone!
    The symptoms of EBOLA are:
    Sweating, weakness, diarrhea and stomach pain.
    A kind of feeling that a husband gets when he sees his wife going through his phone!
  • Most people don't truly appreciate being single until they've been married!
    Most people don't truly appreciate being single until they've been married!
  • People don't get married anymore, they just update their privacy policy!
    People don't get married anymore, they just update their privacy policy!
  • <b>Husband came home from the pub 4 hours late.</b><br/>

Wife: Where the hell have you been?<br/>
Husband: I've been playing poker with some blokes.<br/>
Wife: Playing poker? Well, you can pack your bags and go!<br/>
Husband: So can you, this isn't our house anymore!
    Husband came home from the pub 4 hours late.
    Wife: Where the hell have you been?
    Husband: I've been playing poker with some blokes.
    Wife: Playing poker? Well, you can pack your bags and go!
    Husband: So can you, this isn't our house anymore!
  • Alimony:<br/>
A severance package for those who thought marriage was a good career choice!
    Alimony:
    A severance package for those who thought marriage was a good career choice!
  • A body at rest will continue to be at rest... until your wife notices and finds some work for him!
    A body at rest will continue to be at rest... until your wife notices and finds some work for him!
  • I accompanied my wife when she went to get a haircut.<br/>Reading a magazine, I found a hairstyle I liked for myself. I asked the receptionist if I could take the magazine next door to make a copy of the photo.
`Leave some ID, a driver's license or a credit card,` she said.<br/>
`But my wife is here getting a haircut,` I explained.<br/>
`Yes,` she replied. `But I need something you'll come back for`!
    I accompanied my wife when she went to get a haircut.
    Reading a magazine, I found a hairstyle I liked for myself. I asked the receptionist if I could take the magazine next door to make a copy of the photo. "Leave some ID, a driver's license or a credit card," she said.
    "But my wife is here getting a haircut," I explained.
    "Yes," she replied. "But I need something you'll come back for"!