|Wife to husband: Happy New Year.|
|My friends use to say, "There's plenty of fish in the sea".|
But looks like I ignored their advice and ended up marrying a whale!
|After years of threatening to leave, last night my wife finally broke my heart... |
She has decided to stay!
|Don't bother getting married, just find a woman you don't like and give her a house!|
|A bad marriage is like a horrible job, you are happy to have one but always look out for other options!|
|There was an English language competition. 2000 persons participated...|
The competition was to write in one sentence about peace, calm & happiness.
The Award winner wrote, "My wife is sleeping."
Judges hugged him with tears streaming down their cheeks when presenting the award!
|Wife: Do I look fat?|
Husband: Do I look stupid to answer that?
|When my wife makes me angry, I look at her through the fork and pretend she's in jail.|
It heals me spiritually!
|All married men say after many years of marriage:|
"Our marriage is based on trust and understanding."
She doesn't trust me and I don't understand her!
|My wife's left me because I've eaten far too much chocolate over the Christmas period. |
I think this calls for a celebration!