|Wife: Ugh I gained 3 kilos during vacation. What about you?|
Me while looking at scale showing I actually lost a kilo, I gained 4 kilos!
|How to tell if a guy is married:|
* Sleeps on a foot and a half at the edge of a king sized bed
* Says "what?" a lot
* Just agrees with everything without hearing the whole proposal
|Wife: Aapne Mujh Mein Kya Dekh Kar Shaadi Ki?|
Husband: Nothing... I am daring since my childhood!
|Wife: I have blisters on my hand because of the broom.|
Husband: Next time take the car, silly!
|Husband: I got trapped into marriage.|
Wife (in anger): You were after me; I was not after you. You used to follow me to the bus stop, office, home, everywhere!
Husband: True! The mouse-trap never runs after the mouse! It is the mouse that runs into the trap!
|Taking inspiration from the Indian govt., even my wife has implemented GST:|
'Galti Sirf Tumhari'!
|I love to watch my wife while she eats.|
It's blissful to observe her for a few minutes of silence!
|I wrote 'DIVORCE', my wife wrote 'YES'.|
Tough way to find out, but at least I won our last game of Scrabble!
|They say that marriage is a great institution because using the word jail would be too harsh!|
Wife: Sone Ki Chain Kab Doge?
Husband: Chain Se Sone Kab Dogi?