|Eyelashes are supposed to prevent things from getting in your eyes but when I do have something in my eye, it's always an eyelash. |
|My friend David had lost his ID. |
Now he's just Dav!
|Do you know why I make puns?|
Because it's my respunsibility!
|Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth...|
Then it just becomes a soap opera!
|Today a girl said she recognized me from vegetarian club, but I'm sure I've never met herbivore!|
|Why did the coffee file a police report? |
It got mugged!
|I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down!|
|How many programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?|
None. That's a hardware problem!
|If towels could tell jokes, they would probably have a dry sense of humour!|
|What do you get when a dinosaur mates with a pig?|