• Kind, intelligent, loving and hot.
    This describes everything you...
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    are not!
  • Just Go To Hell,
    Yes You
    You Only
    Because only You .
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    can change - Hell into Heaven, by your sweetness!
  • If it walks like a duck;
    And talks like a duck.
    It simply means - you're drunk;
    Because...
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    Ducks don't talk!
  • A camel, a cow and a donkey were discussing 'who is best'?
    Cow: I give milk.
    Camel: I move heavy loads.
    Donkey: ...
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    What are you waiting for, say something about yourself!
  • I just want to sit down and watch a nice movie with a girlfriend.
    Can anyone recommend...
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    a nice girlfriend?
  • Life is too short to be serious all the time.
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    So if you can't laugh at yourself, call me - I'll laugh at you!
  • Having a good laugh with a friend like you stimulates endorphin's, the brain's natural painkillers. So, if you need to laugh and you can't find a friend like yourself,
    I can lend you my mirror!
  • WARNING WARNING WARNING <br />

Please forward this warning to everyone on your friends list. If someone comes to your front door saying they are checking for ticks due to warm weather and asks you to take off your clothes and dance around with your arms up.<br />

DO NOT DO THIS!! THIS IS A SCAM!!! They only want to see you dance naked. I wish I'd got this yesterday... I feel so stupid!Upload to Facebook
    WARNING WARNING WARNING
    Please forward this warning to everyone on your friends list. If someone comes to your front door saying they are checking for ticks due to warm weather and asks you to take off your clothes and dance around with your arms up.
    DO NOT DO THIS!! THIS IS A SCAM!!! They only want to see you dance naked. I wish I'd got this yesterday... I feel so stupid!
  • Sweetest kiss - on the head!
    Loveliest kiss - on cheeks!
    Most romantic kiss - on the lips!
    And the hottest kiss?
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    On the bike's silencer!
  • Take your age.
    Add 2.
    And that's how old you'll be in 2 years.
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    Forward, if it works for you!
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