SantaBanta SMS

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Banta sent an sms to his pregnant wife.
A few moments later, he got a notification on his phone and he started dancing.
The report said - Delivered!
Santa: I'm worried - it's raining and my wife is in the market.
Banta: Oh, she'll probably step inside some store.
Santa: Yeah. That's what I am worried about!
Banta to Santa: What, according to you, is the difference between a wife and a girl friend?<br/>
Santa: Wife is like a Demand Draft - trust-worthy all the time; and girl friend is like a Cheque, which may bounce any time!
Banta to Santa: What, according to you, is the difference between a wife and a girl friend?
Santa: Wife is like a Demand Draft - trust-worthy all the time; and girl friend is like a Cheque, which may bounce any time!
Jeeto: I hate you when you drink. 
Santa: Darling, I hate you when I don't drink!
Jeeto: I hate you when you drink.
Santa: Darling, I hate you when I don't drink!
Banta: Have you ever been in a railway accident? 
Santa: Yes, Once when I was in a train and we went through a tunnel. And I kissed the father instead of the daughter!
Banta: Have you ever been in a railway accident?
Santa: Yes, Once when I was in a train and we went through a tunnel. And I kissed the father instead of the daughter!
Banta to Santa after he returned from a business tour: Does your wife miss you much? 
Santa: No. She throws remarkably straight for a woman!
Banta to Santa after he returned from a business tour: Does your wife miss you much?
Santa: No. She throws remarkably straight for a woman!
Meanwhile in Punjab: 
Doctor: Yeh Goli 'Tongue' ke Niche Rakhna. 
Santa: Kehdi Tang, Left ya Right?
Meanwhile in Punjab:
Doctor: Yeh Goli 'Tongue' ke Niche Rakhna.
Santa: Kehdi Tang, Left ya Right?
Santa was weeping at a grave, 'Why did you die? Why did you die? Your death ruined my life.'<br/>
Banta: For whom are you mourning so deeply? A child? A parent? Wife? or a Girlfriend ?<br/>
Santa: No. It's my wife's first husband!
Santa was weeping at a grave, "Why did you die? Why did you die? Your death ruined my life."
Banta: For whom are you mourning so deeply? A child? A parent? Wife? or a Girlfriend ?
Santa: No. It's my wife's first husband!
Banta: Someone told me that Cable TV is not good for kids. They don't study at all. So I got it uninstalled.<br/>
Santa: That's a smart thing to do.<br/>
Banta: Thanks. Now I have got a Dish installed instead!
Banta: Someone told me that Cable TV is not good for kids. They don't study at all. So I got it uninstalled.
Santa: That's a smart thing to do.
Banta: Thanks. Now I have got a Dish installed instead!
Santa went to a public toilet and got out after 1 hour.<br/>

The sweeper asked for 20 rupees.<br/>

Santa:  Saale Bathroom mein baithta tha, CYBER CAFE mein nahi!
Santa went to a public toilet and got out after 1 hour.
The sweeper asked for 20 rupees.
Santa: Saale Bathroom mein baithta tha, CYBER CAFE mein nahi!

Quotes

Wise teachers create an environment that encourages students to teach themselves.

Trivia

The average male spends 43 minutes a day staring at 10 different women.

Graffiti

Alimony - When two people make a mistake and one of them continues to pay for it!