|While in America, Santa went to my local shop & asked for a bottle of water.|
Shopkeeper: Still Water?
Santa: Yeah, I haven't changed my mind yet!
|Ailing Santa in a clinic:|
Doctor: Have you ever given yourself a prostate exam?
Santa: No, but I accidentally sat on a toilet brush once!
|Santa: I'm starting to suspect that my wife is getting sick of my bullshit.|
Banta: Why do you think so?
Santa: Because she says it to me all the time!
|Banta: What's the best thing about Switzerland?|
Santa: I don't know, but the flag is a huge plus!
|Banta: I'm starting a condom company, suggest a good name.|
Santa: Name it 'DIPPER'. You'll get free publicity on all Indian trucks - "Use Dipper at night"!
|Pinky: How do I look, daddy?|
Santa: With your eyes, sweetheart!
|Banta: They say time is a great healer.|
Santa: That's probably why when you go to the doctors surgery they keep you waiting so long!
|Jeeto: Why do you talk so much in your sleep?|
Santa: It's the only time you don't correct me.
Jeeto: I never correct you.
Santa is stunned!
|Santa had 3 trays in his office for files:|
IN, OUT & LBW.
Someone asked, "What is this LBW for?"
Santa: Let this Bloody Wait!
|Santa: Do you know how introverts spend their vacations?|
Santa: Staying home away from home!