|Doctor: Do you drink to excess?|
Santa: I'll drink to anything!
|Santa and Banta are drinking at a bar when Banta falls off his stool and slumps motionless to the floor.|
Santa says to the bartender, "I'll say this for Banta, he knows when to stop!"
|Jeeto: This is the last time I tell you about coming home drunk.|
Santa: Good, because I'm sick of hearing it!
|Barber: I have a hair-raising story.|
Banta: Tell it to some bald-headed man!
|Barber: Will you have anything on your face when I've finished?|
Banta: I don't know, but I hope you'll at least leave my nose!
|Santa: My drinking is getting out of hand.|
Banta: That's a thing of concern.
Santa: Yes, sure it is. I dropped 3 pegs last night!
|Santa: Our dog doesn't eat meat.|
Banta: Why not?
Santa: We don't give him any.
|Santa: My wife left me because of my views on the environment. |
Banta: That's really weird.
Santa: Yeah, it really is. I only tried saving water by showering with the woman next door!
|Banta went on a trip to Goa that was part work, part vacation. He fell so in love with the place that he emailed his friend, Santa, "Catch next plane out. Bring my wife and your mistress".|
Santa emailed back, "Your wife and I arriving tomorrow 4:30 PM. How long have you know about us?"
|Santa: Exercise must be good.|
Banta: What makes you say so?
Santa: My wife's tongue has never been sick a day in her life!