|Santa: I've come back to buy the car I was looking at yesterday.|
Salesman: Fine. Now tell me, what was the one dominating thing that made you buy this car?
Santa: My wife!
|Traffic Cop: Didn't you see the speed limit sign?|
Santa: Yes I did; but I didn't see you!
|"Does the razor hurt, sir?" inquired the barber, anxiously.|
"Can't say", replied the victim Banta, testily, "but my face does"!
|A tourist stopped his car on the road and asked Santa as to how far it was to Bhathinda.|
Santa replied, "It's 24,999 miles the way you're going, but if you turn around it ain't but four!
|Santa: Is this tea or coffee? It tastes exactly like kerosene.|
Waiter: If it tastes like kerosene, it's positively tea - because our coffee tastes like turpentine!
|Banta: Has your wife learned to drive the car yet?|
Santa: Yes. In an advisory capacity!
|Banta: If a tiger attacks your mother-in-law and your wife
at the same time, whom would you save?|
Santa: Of course, the tiger.
Banta: But why?
Santa: Very few are left!
|Santa: What are the fastest means of communication?|
Banta: Telephone, Television and Tell-a-woman!
|Santa: What did you do with the money you robbed from the bank?|
Banta: I deposited it in the same bank!
|Banta: How long did it take your wife to learn to drive?|
Santa: It will be ten years in October!