|I wish I got married on February 29th.|
That way my wife would get mad at me for forgetting our anniversary only once in every four years!
|Even after being married for 15 years, I still don't know what to say when my wife asks "What are you thinking?"|
|I have found out that Coronavirus is the best thing that has happened to me lately.|
My wife does not want to fly or take a vacation because she is afraid to get infected. She doesn't go to the mall because she is afraid to get infected. She doesn't shop on the internet because she knows everything comes from China.
This is not a virus - this is a savings plan!
|My wife and I got stuck in an elevator and when we got home, we told the story to our kids. They just looked at us and said, "So... did you get out?"|
My wife and I looked at each other and made a pact to go ahead and start drinking away their college fund!
|Wife: I want you to be honest with me.|
Husband: You look fat in those jeans.
Wife: How dare you say that!
|According to research exercising for 30 minutes every day is a great way to reduce your blood pressure.|
They should know that not getting married is the better way!
Confusion on what gift to buy for your wife's birthday?
Tell her you already got something and make her guess. She'll list the things she wants one by one!
|Marriage is the process where the husband slowly finds out from his wife what kind of a man she would have preferred!|
|Pro Tip for husbands:|
If you tell your wife that she looks too good for her age, she'll not consider it as a compliment.
Telling from my own experience!
|I thought the movie "Transformers" was about what women are best in doing once they get married!|