• There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked.
    ~ Jerry Seinfeld
  • I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.
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    I haven't trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I've never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.
    ~ Erma Bombeck
  • For birth control, I rely on my personality.Upload to Facebook
    For birth control, I rely on my personality.
    ~ Milt Abel
  • Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids.
    ~ Anonymous
  • Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
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    Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
    ~ Billy Crystal
  • Society can overlook murder, adultery or swindling; it never forgives preaching of a new gospel.
    ~ Edmund Burke
  • Don't do it behind the garden gate. Love is blind but the neighbors ain't!Upload to Facebook
    Don't do it behind the garden gate. Love is blind but the neighbors ain't!
    ~ Anonymous
  • A boy goes to a strip club. His mom gets angry and asks him did you see anything there that you weren't supposed to see?
    Boy: Yes, I saw dad!
  • Sex is more fun than cars but cars refuel quicker than men.Upload to Facebook
    Sex is more fun than cars but cars refuel quicker than men.
    ~ Germaine Greer
  • Humans are the only animal who can have sex over the phone.
    ~ Dave Letterman
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