• Martinis are like breasts, one isn't enough, and three is too many.
    ~ Herb Caen
  • My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
    ~ Socrates
  • The ideal man doesn't exist. A husband is easier to find.
    ~ Britt Ekland
  • I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
    ~ Winston Churchill
  • Sometimes in the quest for enlightenment the only thing that gets lighter is your wallet.
    ~ Steve Maraboli
  • When you can't figure out what to do, it's time for a nap.
    ~ Mason Cooley
  • An Indian without horoscope is like an American without a credit card.
    ~ Shashi Tharoor
  • Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
    Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
    ~ Jackie Mason
  • There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
    ~ Henry Kissinger
  • There is still no cure for the common birthday.
    ~ John Glenn