India: Mujh Ko Piya Ne Dekh Liya Haaye Re Dhokhe Se!
|Teachers will be quick to say that a classroom isn't a place to sleep, but by that logic a house isn't a place to study!|
|I hate brushing my teeth at night because that signifies that you can't have any more food and I'm just never ready for that kind of commitment!|
|When the person you stalk stalks you back...|
Can we call it a 'Stalk exchange'?
|Interviewer: We are looking for a complete Indian man!|
Candidate: Sir, Signal Green Hone Ke 5 Second Pehle Hi Gadi Nikaal Leta Hun!
|The first person to explain the concept of dreaming to others must have been very relieved when they realised everyone else did it too!|
I think 'Sober October' is really a good idea, the people doing it are amazing!
Less queuing at the bar for me!
|I've named my puppies Timex and Rolex.|
They're watch dogs!
|A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Caesar all walk into a bar.|
He came, he saw, he conquered!
|People often ask me what my wife does, but it's difficult to say really.|
She sells seashells on the sea shore!