|Therapist: Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is it true?|
Husband: To be honest, I never knew she sold flowers!
|When your wife says "I can't even tell you how upset I am with you right now", just wait for 3 seconds.|
And here we go!
|I think my wife is trying to speak to me in French since morning. She is uttering words like...|
very difficult to understand!
|The next time your wife gets angry, drape a towel over her shoulders (like a cape) and say, "Now you are Super Angry!"|
Maybe she'll laugh.
Maybe you'll die!
|I blame all the marriage problems that I have on my wife, because of her poor choice in selecting a husband!|
|I gave my wife some tips on how to wash the dishes better.|
In other news, this Pril dish wash liquid is really starting to make my hands soft!
|I impress my wife by buying her dresses marked small and then by looking surprised when she says that it doesn't fit her!|
|My wife pissed me off in my dream last night. When I told her about it, she said it was probably due to something I started.|
Long story short, I had to apologize and buy her flowers!
|Husbands are like newborn babies.|
They know that they're being scolded, but never understand why!
|I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, but then it was too late!|