• Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last.
    Sex
  • Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
  • Virginity can be cured.
    Sex
  • When I was born, I was given a choice - A big dick or a good memory. I don't remember, what I chose!
  • Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.
  • Thou shalt not commit adultery, unless in the mood.
  • 6.9: Oral sex ruined by a period.
  • Stop calling yourself hot. The only thing you turn on is the microwave.
  • When two's company, three's the result!
  • Open books, not legs, blow minds, not guys.
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