• Santa: Hey, how's your sex life?<br />
Banta: Non-existent. After tiring herself out on WhatsApp during the day, my wife is in no mood to care about What's Up at night!
    Santa: Hey, how's your sex life?
    Banta: Non-existent. After tiring herself out on WhatsApp during the day, my wife is in no mood to care about What's Up at night!
  • Santa: Son, what do you wanna be when you grow up?<br/>
Pappu: Dad, I want to be a pizza delivery boy.<br/>
Dad: What?<br/>
Pappu: Yeah, or I would like to be a gardener or a plumber.<br/>
Santa: You went through my porn videos again, did you?
    Santa: Son, what do you wanna be when you grow up?
    Pappu: Dad, I want to be a pizza delivery boy.
    Dad: What?
    Pappu: Yeah, or I would like to be a gardener or a plumber.
    Santa: You went through my porn videos again, did you?
  • Angry neighbour: You slept with my wife, you son of a bitch, I'm gonna make you pay for that.<br />
Santa: Bullshit, why should I pay TWICE!
    Angry neighbour: You slept with my wife, you son of a bitch, I'm gonna make you pay for that.
    Santa: Bullshit, why should I pay TWICE!
  • There's a big difference between men and women when they say:
    "I finished an entire box of tissues watching that film last night!"
  • To make it straight, she pulls it.
    To make it stand, she rubs it.
    To make it stiff, she licks it.
    To put it in, she pushes it.
    It's hell of a job, threading a needle!
  • Irony of Life:
    Wife doesn't get pregnant after many attempts;
    And girlfriends get pregnant even after taking precautions!
  • My wife and I finally became sexually compatible... now we get simultaneous headaches!
  • The Dick Song at different ages:<br />
15-18: Pehla Nasha<br />
18-30: Dhoom Macha Le Dhoom<br />
30-40: Kabhi Khusi Kabhi Gham<br />
40-55: Kal Ho Na Ho...

55+ : Pappu can't Dance Sala...
    The Dick Song at different ages:
    15-18: Pehla Nasha
    18-30: Dhoom Macha Le Dhoom
    30-40: Kabhi Khusi Kabhi Gham
    40-55: Kal Ho Na Ho... 55+ : Pappu can't Dance Sala...
  • Ever wondered why women wear panties with printed flowers?
    They want it to be watered with a hose!
  • A young lady walks into a doctors office.
    Lady: Doctor, I'm suffering from a terrible discharge."
    The Doctor lays her down lifts up her dress and has a good probe around and says "how does that feel?"
    Lady: Oooh doctor, that feels lovely... but the discharge is from my ear!
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT