• The best remedy for a dry mouth... is a wet pussy!
    The best remedy for a dry mouth... is a wet pussy!
  • He whispered, `Can we have sex tonight?`<br/>
She showed her whisper, and the conversation ended!
    He whispered, "Can we have sex tonight?"
    She showed her whisper, and the conversation ended!
  • I was offered sex today by a 26-year-old woman. In an exchange that I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner on my social media accounts and tell my friends about it. Of course, I declined because of my morals and strong willpower, which is almost as strong as Cleanex, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available scented with lemon or vanilla!
    I was offered sex today by a 26-year-old woman. In an exchange that I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner on my social media accounts and tell my friends about it. Of course, I declined because of my morals and strong willpower, which is almost as strong as Cleanex, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available scented with lemon or vanilla!
  • The secret to a good marriage is having sex at least 3 times a week.
    And at least once with your wife!
  • Two guys over a drink at the bar.
    Chump: You know, I've never really understood what a dilemma is..."
    Chucky: Let me give you an example. Imagine you wake up in a bed with two people next to you. To your left is an incredibly beautiful woman willing to have you, and to your right is a very horny gay man."
    Chump: So where's the dilemma?"
    Chucky: To whom do you turn your back?"
  • My penis was in the Guinness Book of Records...
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    until the librarian kicked me out!
  • Vaginas are like the weather.
    When it's wet, it's time to go inside!
  • A girl, in half a second, will look at your watch, your shoes, your ring fingers and make a decision...
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    while you're still looking at her boobs!
  • It is said that if your palms are itching, you'll get money.
    If your toes are itching, you'll get new shoes.
    And if your privates are itching....
    Don't fool yourself that you will travel to Bangkok.
    Go see a Doctor!
  • As I slipped my finger slowly inside her hole... I could immediately feel it getting wetter and wetter. I took my finger back out and within seconds she was going down on me.
    "I really need a new fucking boat" I thought to myself!
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT