|A guy donated blood to his girl friend. After things got sour between them, the guy wanted his blood back.|
The girl threw a bloody tampon at him and said, I'll give it back to you in monthly installments.
|Q: Why do hunters make the best lovers?|
A: Because they go deep in the bush, shoot more than once and they eat what they shoot.
|Ancient Chinese Wisdom for Men:|
Always marry a woman with small hands. It makes your tool look bigger!
|Q: What did the sign on the door of the whorehouse say?|
A: Beat it - we're closed.
|Arguing about big and small breasts is like making a choice between Budweiser and Heineken!|
Men'll take whatever is available as long as it's not flat.
|At the card shop, a woman was spending a long time looking at the cards, finally shaking her head each time, muttering, "No".|
A clerk finally came over and asked, "And how may I help you?"
"I just don't know," said the woman. Do you have any "Sorry, I laughed at your dick cards?"
|Maybelline makes eyelashes look four times larger. It's high time Maybelline start making condoms!|
|Q: What's the difference between a child and an egg?|
A: An egg is the result of a sitting hen and a child is a result of a standing cock.
|Q: What's an Australian kiss?|
A: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under.
|Grammar is important. Capital letters are the difference between "helping your Uncle Jack off a horse" and "helping your uncle jack off a horse".|