• I thought being an adult would involve more sex!Upload to Facebook
    I thought being an adult would involve more sex!
  • `Lemme put is this way`<br/>
~ gist of KamasutraUpload to Facebook
    "Lemme put is this way"
    ~ gist of Kamasutra
  • Sex is like air - it's not important unless you aren't getting any!Upload to Facebook
    Sex is like air - it's not important unless you aren't getting any!
  • I wonder if receptionists at sperm banks ever say `Thanks for coming`!Upload to Facebook
    I wonder if receptionists at sperm banks ever say "Thanks for coming"!
  • Men are like chocolate bars - sweet, smooth, and they usually go straight to your hips!Upload to Facebook
    Men are like chocolate bars - sweet, smooth, and they usually go straight to your hips!
  • Do one nice thing for someone today.<br/>
Leave them the F*** alone!Upload to Facebook
    Do one nice thing for someone today.
    Leave them the F*** alone!
  • Why do 'balls' equate to toughness and 'pussy' equates to weakness when even the slightest flick to the nuts sends a guy to his knees and vaginas can push out an entire human being?
  • When a male Octopus finds a mate, he rips off his penis and throws it at the female so she can inseminate herself. Then the male grows a new penis.
    If that isn't the most epic way to tell someone "Go fuck yourself" I don't know what is!
  • Masturbation is like procrastination, it's all good and fun until you realize you are only fucking yourself!
  • A man's shirt on the naked female body is like a flag on a conquered fortress!