|When a bomb goes off in the middle of a herd of cows, there will be udder destruction.|
|Whenever I'm not spending my time being awesome. I spend it being fucking awesome.|
|Q: What's the similarity between a man and an uppercase Q?|
A: They're both big fat zeroes with little dicks hanging off them.
|Q: What's hard, long, and has cum in it?|
A: A cucumber.
But I like the way you think!
|There was this Eskimo girl who spent a night with her boyfriend and the next morning found out that she was six months pregnant.|
|Q: How do you tell an old man?|
A: It isn't hard.
|Q: Why are men like a toothbrush?|
A: Bcoz they are useless without a handle.
|Skinny = Anorexic|
Thick = Obese
Virgin = Too good
Non-virgin = Slut
Friendly = Fake
Quiet = Rude
One can never please the society.
|Q: Why do girls like to date Basketball players?|
A: Bcoz they dribble a lot before shooting.
|When someone texts you "I miss You" after midnight, it really means "I miss the sex".|