|Principal: Keep your son under proper control.|
Santa: What happened, sir?
Principal: In the sex column, he writes - never got an opportunity!
|Santa: I was screwing my wife last night and she looked back and said, `I'm feeling kinky! Turn off the light and stick it in my ass!`|
Santa: As soon as I did, she screamed!
Santa: I guess maybe next time I should wait for the bulb to cool down first!
|Think before you send Good Morning text to someone.|
Banta messaged Santa: GM!
Santa texted back: Tu Apni GM!
|Neighbour: Do you have some oil?|
Santa: No, but you can use Vaseline.
Neighbour: I am asking for the cooking oil!
|Santa: You know Viagra is like Disneyworld?|
Banta: Why do you think that?
Santa: Because you have to wait an hour for a three-minute ride!
|Border Par Jung Shuru Ho Gayi|
Santa: Major Sahab Main Dushmano Ki Maa Chod Dunga.
Major: Bhosdike, Dushman Marne Hai, Paida Nahi Karne!
|Santa had 3 trays in his office for files:|
IN, OUT & LBW.
Banta asked, "Oye Santa what is this LBW mean?"
Santa replied: Let Bhenchod Wait!
|Santa: Last night my wife and I reached the height of sexual compatibility.|
Santa: We both had a headache!
|Banta: What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis?|
Santa: You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!
|Banta: During sex you burn as much calories as running for 5 miles. Santa: Who the hell runs 5 miles in 30 seconds?|