• Banta: My wife is obsessed with cars. While asleep, she holds my bird and says `1st gear, 2nd gear...`<br />
Santa: My wife is worse, she puts my bird inside her and says `Full tank, please`!
    Banta: My wife is obsessed with cars. While asleep, she holds my bird and says "1st gear, 2nd gear..."
    Santa: My wife is worse, she puts my bird inside her and says "Full tank, please"!
  • Santa and Banta were in a pub sitting at the bar, staring into their drinks.<br />
Banta gets a curious look on his face and asks, `Hey Santa, have you ever seen an ice-cube with a hole in it before?`<br /> Santa: Yep. I been married to one for fifteen years!
    Santa and Banta were in a pub sitting at the bar, staring into their drinks.
    Banta gets a curious look on his face and asks, "Hey Santa, have you ever seen an ice-cube with a hole in it before?"
    Santa: Yep. I been married to one for fifteen years!
  • Banta shook Santa's hand and asked, "So how's your Sex Partner?
    Santa with great sadness, "You are shaking it right now!"
  • Santa: Hey, how's your sex life?<br />
Banta: Non-existent. After tiring herself out on WhatsApp during the day, my wife is in no mood to care about What's Up at night!
    Santa: Hey, how's your sex life?
    Banta: Non-existent. After tiring herself out on WhatsApp during the day, my wife is in no mood to care about What's Up at night!
  • Angry neighbour: You slept with my wife, you son of a bitch, I'm gonna make you pay for that.<br />
Santa: Bullshit, why should I pay TWICE!
    Angry neighbour: You slept with my wife, you son of a bitch, I'm gonna make you pay for that.
    Santa: Bullshit, why should I pay TWICE!
  • Santa was screwing his secretary up the ass when his wife walked in.<br />
Jeeto cried out, `You can't do this to me!`<br />
Santa: I know that's why I'm doing it with her!
    Santa was screwing his secretary up the ass when his wife walked in.
    Jeeto cried out, "You can't do this to me!"
    Santa: I know that's why I'm doing it with her!
  • Jeeto (shouting): Stop watching porn, I can hear it in the kitchen.
    Santa: I'm not. It's Sharapova vs Serena... I'm watching Tennis!
  • Santa: Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use a protection.<br />
Banta: Generally what brand condoms do you use?<br />
Santa: No No No... not condoms. I use a fake name and a fake number!
    Santa: Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use a protection.
    Banta: Generally what brand condoms do you use?
    Santa: No No No... not condoms. I use a fake name and a fake number!
  • Banta: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?<br />
Santa: Ask your mother!
    Banta: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
    Santa: Ask your mother!
  • Santa: How was the interview?<br />
Banta: It was good. But in the end, they asked me to show my  'testimonials'.<br />
Santa: Then?<br />
Banta: I think I showed them something wrong!
    Santa: How was the interview?
    Banta: It was good. But in the end, they asked me to show my 'testimonials'.
    Santa: Then?
    Banta: I think I showed them something wrong!
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